Are you still at the party or did I leave?
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
ok first of all what the fuck
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
