are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Randomize
