haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
You work out of a Hotel?
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
