Having a random hookup so left but love u
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
