About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
So apparently I’m into choking now
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
