sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Randomize
