I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
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