she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
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