physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
How naked do you want me to be?
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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