Whatcha textin bout Willis?
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Randomize
