I want to stick my p in your. b.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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