Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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