Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Randomize
