How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
