awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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