I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
Randomize
