i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
