Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
