And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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