you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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