Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
