i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Randomize
