ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
you win again, gameday.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Randomize
