He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
This girl is more easily done than said...
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
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