I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize
