How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Randomize