Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
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