Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Randomize
