Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
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