Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize