you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
