I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Randomize
