I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Randomize
