PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
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