Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize
