So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Randomize
