Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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