i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize
