My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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