3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
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