So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
