another moral hangover. fuck.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Randomize