THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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