Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize
