So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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