I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
i dont even know how to be here
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
