he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize