Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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