She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
