Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize
